måndag 4 april 2016

Hostfamily and Hostsisters and being tired

Why is it always to difficult in the beginning lol
I'm constantly tired, it might be the weather too (I always get a bit blue when its cloudy)
but yeah things have started to go a bit better. Yesterday I had a nice conversation with my hostfam about Sweden and my heritage. Nice. 
But its a bit difficult with my current hostsis because, I like her, and she's cute and nice but I dont know what to talk about and since I'm this under the weather I'm afraid she will see me as a boring person but at the same time I dont have the energy to care. Its all very messed up lol. 
She was a friend in school but when you start living together you really see the true person they are, and I guess she sees me now. I always try to be energetic in school to so whenever I get home I'm tired of faking. Lmao I'm so tired of faking so much but like, here its a different culture and all that, I have to smile and I have to try my best to socialize and look like I'm having fun even though I want to sleep. I'm feeling tired and I dont know why or how to solve it. I omly get happy and energetic for reals when I'm with my true friends.
I miss that with Sweden and my last hostfamily.
I could be myself and relax and be comfortable with them because they have come to know me. 
I guess I will have to do the same here, but not everyone are the same so will it work. idk.

Things that keep me alive are honestly my plans too. I want to do things. But I want to do them with fun people, not only observe but live. 

Gonna try my best these last two months. 
Met my first hostsis, love her soooooo much
she was in Australia for 1 month with the school, livin in a hostfam and everything
i feel like she understands me more now
so nice to meet her again

And my baby precious Nano :-( love her the moooost she is so unique and one of a kind, really glad and happy that she's my sister

söndag 3 april 2016

New and last hostfamily in japan

2 months left
And ive changed hostfamily
I loved my last one so I feel a bit homesick now, wanna go back to them
But i have to do as a good exchange student would and keep it all inside and just try to do the best with the situation
Im so extremely tired though
Ive cried a few times, want to cry more to let it all out but its not horrible here, its just different and i just finally became so loved and everything felt good in the last hostfam and then i changed you know. It hurts.

I dont know what to do because im tired, and i want them to like me so i dont wanna b tired i wanna be happy and not tired lol but here i am sleeping my afternoon away watching gaycation and sobbing

Exchange is so wierd man
Atleast my new room has billions of stars on the walls and an amazing view because we live in the 22th floor 😇
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